Normal History Vol. 389: The Art Of David Lester

Every Saturday, we’ll be posting a new illustration by David Lester. The Mecca Normal guitarist is visually documenting people, places and events from his band’s 32-year run, with text by vocalist Jean Smith.

The Dark Side Of Maria
Song slivers arrive in shipping and receiving, between photo-cutter roar and dry-mounting rumble. With my mind, I add the sounds together and turn the nearly inaudible radio into Marvin Gaye. Regardless of what’s playing I hear “Sexual Healing.” Sexual, sexual healing.
Paul comes to look out the window. Wincing at the brightness, he fingers the paper white orchid. I turn away. He asks me, “What’s your favorite movie?”
”Harold And Maude,” I say. “It’s about a suicidal young guy who falls in love with an eccentric old woman.”

“OK. What’s your second favourite movie?”
 “Picnic At Hanging Rock,” I say. “Australian school girls lost in the outback.”

Paul lays his head on the postage scale. 
”Ten pounds, 10 ounces,” I say. 
On coffee break, Maria talks about her roommate. “He’s white. He’s single. He’s 50, but he’s circumcised. Jean, Jean, Jean, do you prefer cut or uncut?”

In my mind, I see the penises of recent dalliances, dicks and cocks of old relationships. Cut, uncut. Cut, uncut. Maria and the others are waiting for my answer, for my preference.

Maria says, “Uncut is ugly.”

Eileen says, “How do you know?”

Maria says, “I’ve seen a photo.”

The dark side of Maria. We are nibbling on Mike Dean’s banana bread. Mike is the Jethro Bodine handyman at the photo lab. He’s been phoning his mother across three time zones to get her recipes. He brings baked goods to work on the bus, triple plastic-wrapped. Pies, cookies, biscuits. He wants a reaction. He wants a reaction from the dark side of Maria.

“The Dark Side Of Maria” from the album The Observer (Kill Rock Stars, 2006) (download):