As 2012 comes to an end, we are taking a look back at some of our favorite posts of the year by our guest editors.
The first Corin Tucker Band album, 2010’s 1,000 Years, was dominated by moody, thoughtful songcraft—quite a left-turn coming after Tucker’s last album (to date) with groundbreaking trio Sleater-Kinney, 2005’s furiously distortion-heavy The Woods. But now, 1,000 Years’ follow-up, Kill My Blues (Kill Rock Stars), is another sonic shift. The guitars are louder, the textures more extreme, and Tucker’s lyrics on the album cover an amazing gamut—from clarion calls to teenage memories to more elliptical pieces. At times, the LP brings to mind S-K’s post-September 11 album, 2002’s One Beat, a collection of rock anthems for troubled times. Throughout Kill My Blues, Tucker writes—and the band plays—like something important is truly at stake on every song. The Corin Tucker Band—which also includes drummer Sara Lund, guitarist Seth Lorinczi and bassist Mike Clark (as well as touring bassist Dave Depper)—will be guest editing magnetmagazine.com all week. Read our brand new feature on the group.
Lund: Maybe you’ve heard about or read Anne-Marie Slaughter’s piece for the July/August edition of Atlantic Monthly, “Why Women Still Can’t Have It All.” In it, Slaughter describes giving up a powerful dream job as the first woman director of policy planning at the State Department to be a more present and available parent to her children. Now in her mid-50s, Slaughter feels she and her generation of feminists have been unrealistic with themselves about their ability to juggle high-level professional careers with family, at least in the current American social and economic structure. I highly recommend the article, whether you are a professional, a woman or a parent. In fact, especially if you are none of these things, you should definitely take the time to read it.
As I read it, I was continuously struck by the correlations between her insights and the position of women, especially mothers, in rock. Like most professional women, it has always been my desire to be seen as equal to my male counterparts. The fascination with my gender as criteria for judging my musical talents has always driven me fucking bananas. But to “compete” in the music world means working your ass off in the social and economic structure that is still heavily dominated by men. Which basically means touring constantly to promote your music and keep yourself in the public eye if you have any hope of earning any kind of a living.
For people with families, this usually means spending huge amounts of time away from your children and partners. And here I am drawn back to Slaughter’s piece. As she points out, it is quite frankly easier for men to justify “abandoning” their families for the good of their career. It is accepted by society and often even (eventually) accepted by their children. A balanced life is still far more elusive for women than their male counterparts. Condoleezza Rice was the first female national security adviser. She was also the first person in that position since the 1950s not to have a family.
Women continue to be asked to make the choice between their careers and their family. Many women I know in music have chosen not to have children. I absolutely respect that decision for anyone. And there are certainly more reasons than one’s career to elect not to breed. But for those of us who have followed the biological call to procreate and have found ourselves madly in love with our children, leaving them behind for the sake of our career is a heart-wrenching and frankly impossible decision to make. Just as Slaughter’s colleagues seemed to pity her for leaving Washington and her powerful position in government, I feel the pity and disappointment from people who don’t understand how I could give up the circle of cool rock people for the responsibilities of parenthood. It becomes about more than just “needing” to spend time with your family, but actually wanting to.
Please don’t think that I am complaining about “having” to play music for a living. First of all, I don’t think you could call the money I make from music “a living.” I am so incredibly lucky that right now I can play music without having to also work a day job. That is partially due to the fact that my husband is also a musician. But he is working those insane hours of endless tours after endless tours. He is touring in a way that, even if given the opportunity, I would never do. Don’t get me wrong; being away from our family is desperately hard for him. But he is following his lifelong dream of playing music. It is also my lifelong dream, but my heart keeps me home with my child. Corin Tucker Band is on the road for a month away from our children, and although I couldn’t be more excited about being out there and playing this music (I really do love touring), knowing it’s a full month away from my son completely breaks my heart.
