MAGNET contributing writer Jud Cost is sharing some of the wealth of classic films he’s been lucky enough to see over the past 40 years. Trolling the backwaters of cinema, he has worked up a list of more than 500 titles—from the silent era through the ’90s—that you may have missed. A new selection, all currently available on DVD, appears every week.
My Beautiful Laundrette (1985, 98 minutes)
An overeager goon squad obliterates the large stack of broken-down furniture jammed into the front door as a barricade. The unholy racket lights a fire under Johnny (Daniel Day-Lewis), sporting the angular haircut of a post-punk on the dole. He hurriedly wakes his boyfriend from a deep sleep on a mattress on the floor, then begins to throw their meager possessions into a plastic garbage bag.
It’s moving day for the local squatters, and Johnny sends a peaceful signal to the thug who enters their bedroom. The two transients jump out the second floor window, grab a few items from the clothesline and head for the next abandoned flat somewhere in London.
Born into a very tight Pakistani clan, Omar (Gordon Warnecke) is taking a break from college studies to inhale deeply. He’s presently taking care of his father, an alcoholic journalist who lives in a tiny bedsit 30 yards from a British Rail trunk-line. “If your face gets any longer you’ll overbalance,” says his dad (Roshan Seth) tweaking Omar on the cheek before finishing off a bottle of Smirnoff vodka.
Dad rings up Omar’s uncle Nasser to see if a better situation can be found. “Can you give Omar some work in your garage?” he asks his brother. “Oh come on, the bugger is your nephew. He sweeps the dust here from one place to another, squeezes shirts, and he makes soup. That hardly stretches him. Oh, and try to fix him up with a nice girl. I’m not sure if his penis is in full working order.” That last request may be a tall order once Omar reconnects with Johnny and rekindles their former relationship.
“Hey, is that your car!” a sharply dressed Pakistani shouts menacingly at Omar, giving a limousine the once-over in an upmarket London parking garage. All is well, moments later, with Omar’s identity confirmed by his uncle. “The bastard who almost beat you up is Salim. You’ll be seeing a lot of him,” warns Nasser (Saeed Jaffrey). The kid is put to work washing the cars of Nasser’s best customers.
One night, at a tony bistro, Nasser reveals his plans for Omar. “I’ve brought you here to tell you one essential thing. In this damn country, which we hate and love, you can get anything you want. It’s all spread out and available. That’s why I believe in England. You only have to know how to squeeze the tits of the system. I am going to turn you into something damn good. You’re like a son to me.” To prove it, Nasser hands over a rundown laundromat to be upgraded by Omar and Johnny. With its luxurious neon lights and spectacular Chi-Chi club decor, the finished product could have stepped right out of a classic Busby Berkeley Hollywood dance extravaganza.
