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From The Desk Of Trans Am: Creatine

After 24 years and 10 albums, we’re still trying to figure out Trans Am. A statement of misguided complication or exaggeration? Maybe. But the trio—guitarist Phil Manley, bassist/keyboardist/vocalist Nathan Means, drummer Sebastian Thomson—hasn’t exactly made comprehension easy considering its non-linear progression, lack of canned press statements and refusal to submit to expectation. Trans Am’s throw-at-a-dartboard-and-see-what-sticks approach notwithstanding, the band finds itself with a 10th album in its laps. Volume X (Thrill Jockey) leans toward the streamlined sensibility of 2007’s Sex Change, snidely and playfully existing somewhere between krautrock, post-rock, electro-rock, punk rock and other prefix-rock. Trans Am will be guest editing magnetmagazine.com all week. Read our new feature on them.

Creatine

Thomson: Coffee consumption has become incredibly widespread in America nowadays—so widespread it almost feels obligatory. For many Americans, the main benefit of this trend is stimulation first and taste second. Stimulation is an understandable goal, but for a large portion of drinkers, coffee’s effect is nervous and jittery with few good side effects.

What if there were a stimulant that was legal, gave you a lift that was much more physical than coffee’s, helped build muscle and was good for your memory and bones? One that was tested by the EU and found to have no ill effects at the recommended dose?

This product is already available but is in dire need of rebranding. I am speaking of course of creatine, an acid that when consumed (in larger quantities than are naturally produced by the liver) gives the user a strong high. It is normally used by weightlifters and other athletes to improve performance, aid recovery after a workout and help add muscle mass.

So why does this product have such a bad public image? Because of the containers it is sold in. We have all scoffed at them when we walk past GNC. Those huge bulbous rounded cylinders that remind one of a Botero painting. Most people see these giant plastic tubs and think of steroids and gigantic men and self-image problems. But these people are missing out on a great feeling. What creatine needs is a rebranding- start selling it in small glass jars with names like “Natural Energy” or in juice bars in smoothies called “Morning Fury” and watch the trend begin.