Power-pop progenitors? O.G. DIYers? The last college-rock survivors? No label adequately captures the four-decade journey of Zion, Ill.’s Shoes, who have released their first new studio material in 17 years. Perhaps the most astonishing thing about Shoes is that this ethic and attitude prevails despite a collection of music-biz bumps and bruises that could rival Charlie Brown in terms of sheer career futility. In some ways, they’re the Forrest Gumps of rock. Shoes essentially presaged punk’s DIY movement by recording its first, early-’70s albums in the living room before garnering enough critical acclaim to merit a major-label contract. Shoes will be guest editing magnentmagazine.com all week. Read our new feature on the band.
Klebe: When I was a kid, my parents always stressed the importance of using the phrase “thank you” to show appreciation for those who serve you, to never take people for granted. Well, after much contemplation, I’ve come to the conclusion that my parents’ advice doesn’t apply very well in today’s world. In fact, many times using the phrase does nothing more than make me look like a total chump.
Here’s a recent example of what I’m talking about. While in a hurry, I reluctantly decided to drive through a local Taco Bell:
“Hello. Welcome to Taco Bell. Would you like to try our Taco 12 Pack today?”
I replied, “Hi. No thank you. I’d like a number five with a Diet Coke.”
After a long pause, a different and even more garbled voice blurted out, ”Hello. Welcome to Taco Bell. Would you like to try our Taco 12 Pack today?”
I shook my head and politely repeated, “No, thank you. I’d like a number five with a Diet Coke.”
After another long pause, the same voice asked, “Uh, you want anything else?”
And I replied, “No. Thank you.”
Then, a different voice altogether took my ear off when it shouted, “Your total is $6.93. Pull up to the window.”
For some reason, once again, I followed with, “Thank you.”
The voice replied, “Yep.”
When I drove up to the window, another guy was waiting and barked out, “$6.93!” I handed him a $10 bill, and he grabbed it without a word. When he gave me my change, I replied, “Thank you.”
He responded, “Yep.”
Then a woman’s hand shot out of the window holding my drink. I took it from her hand and said, “Thank you.”
She responded, “Yep.”
While I waited for my food, I took a sip of what I thought was Diet Coke and realized that it was regular Coke. A minute later the window opened again and another guy shoved a bag of food in my face and said, “There ya go.”
I responded, “Thank you.”
He answered, “Yep.”
Then I pointed out that I had been given the wrong drink. With a frustrated look, he mumbled under his breath, “Oh, man,” and snatched my cup back. Almost feeling a little guilty for being such a nuisance, I added, “Thank you. Sorry.”
“Yep,” he replied. In a matter of seconds, he handed me my Diet Coke and said, “There ya go.”
I carefully grabbed it and said, “Thank you.”
He snapped back, “Yep.”
I cringe as I recall my pride hitting rock bottom. As I put my car into drive, I let out one last “Thank you.” But I couldn’t quite get the words out before he slammed the window closed.
When I got home, I discovered that they messed up my order, plus there was no taco sauce or napkins. Some days I just hate myself.
Video after the jump.
One reply on “From The Desk Of Shoes’ Gary Klebe: Say Thank You And Shut Up”
I laughed all the way through this; unfortunately, I’m sure many of us can relate. Makes one understand why movies like “Falling Down” are made.